HOW TO FIT IN AT THE GLOBAL WARMING SUMMIT IN COPENHAGEN

For a little while, at least, the air over Copenhagen, Denmark will be some of the filthiest in the world.  Not because, as you might suspect, there will be a lot of politicians talking in Copenhagen.  Rather, it will be the 140 private jets and over 1200 limousines set aside to transport the world’s most important people as they meet to discuss how we can get a grip on the global temperature.

So, I thought I’d write a tutorial about how to fit in at the Global Warming Summit in Copenhagen.  Here goes:

1.  Make reservations for your stay.  Remember to do it early, as most of the twenty-room hotel penthouses will be filled in record time.

2.  If you can’t get a top floor penthouse, have one of your people find a mansion to rent for the week.  At a minimum, this mansion should have ten bedrooms, an Olympic Sized swimming pool with the heat turned up, because your arthritis requires the water to be kept at a comfy eighty-two degrees, as well as vaulted ceilings and an open air real wood fireplace, which always creates such a nice ambiance for dinner guests.  The entire fifty acre yard should be well lit , so that your neighbors will know you are there.

3.  Pre-order your new private Gulf Stream Jet at least two years in advance.  I hear they are having trouble filling orders on time.

4.  On the morning of your departure, be sure to wave to the people waiting in line at the public airport, as they have their bags checked on their way to pauper-class seating.  Shake your head in amazement, as you wonder how anyone survives without their own private jet.  Be sure you have your jet warming up before you arrive; you don’t want to sit in a cold jet, it can be very uncomfy.  Have your limo driver take you right to the steps of your jet, as you cannot be exposed to the cold weather for more than a few moments.

5. As you exit your limo, be sure to tell your driver to have the limo idling prior to your return.  You wouldn’t want to get into a cold limo.

6.  As you are waiting to touch down in Copenhagen, dial up your temporary limo driver in Copenhagen, and tell them to make sure the limo is idling and warm for you.  Tell them you’d like to go for a ride around the countryside for about an hour or so, and see the sights in your limo.

7.  As you arrive at the hotel, you remember that you forgot to check if your suite has a private elevator.  If it doesn’t, make a scene until they find you one that does.

8.  As you are inspecting your living quarters, you will notice that the bellhop is holding out his hand for the tip.  Have your personal valet hand him a coupon for ten percent off of Prius accessories at his local Toyota dealership.

9.  It’s dinnertime!  Sure, you could go the vegetarian route, but I recommend the Prime Rib.  I hear they do it fantastically in Denmark.  As you are ordering, ask the waiter to have someone turn up the heat; there’s a chill in the air tonight.  Nod with enthusiastic approval as your dinner guest orders the flaming kabob.

10.  As you arrive back at the suite, strip down and step into the room-sized two-person jacuzzi, complete with Air Conditioning, because all that humid air gets hot after a while.  Turn on the twelve television sets and catch your favorite news and sports.  Afterwards, call your limo driver and tell him to warm up the car; you’ve decided to take a stroll, and want to be driven to that beautiful park you saw on your way back to the hotel.  Take the wool overcoat, it’s going to be chilly.  Tell your driver to keep the car running while you are gone.

11.  After getting back to the suite, have your valet stop at the front desk, and tell the help to have a warm glass of milk brought up to you.  As you are dismissing the bellhop, hand him a tract on the evils of the cattle industry.  Take a sip of your warm milk, and hand it back to him, saying, “It’ too warm.  Can you please put some ice in it?”

12.  Go to bed, being sure to have your valet turn the heat up, and dial the electric blanket  to “Very Snuggly”.

13.  Next day, wake up, and repeat.  During the Summit, be sure to commiserate with your fellow important peoples about the evils of carbon dioxide, and how the masses really do need to get a grip on how they are living.  As you talk about the danger the earth is in, be sure to complain to the host about the all the exhaust fumes outside of the conference center.  Which should remind you; pick up your Blackberry, and dial up your driver.  Tell him you want the Limo idling and warm when you leave.

THE END OF THE DECADE

In twenty-five days, the Oughts of the Twenty-First century will end.

That’s right, we are approaching the end of a decade, and no one is talking about it, no one is marking it.  I thought I’d change that.

These last ten years have been mostly forgettable for me, and yet for all purposes, I can’t help but feel a bit nostalgic as the decade nears its end.  I crested the age of forty in this decade, taught my daughter how to drive a car, lost a wife and a marriage, a home, a business, started two new businesses, and experienced this latest recession more personally than I would have liked.  But in the end, what will be the things that I will remember about the first decade of the new millenium?

From an American perspective, will we remember September 11, 2001 as the most important day of the decade, or will we think of something else?  How about you?  What will you be carrying with you from the Oughts of the Twenty-First Century?

DO WE HAVE THE STOMACH TO SEE THIS THING THROUGH?

President Obama has made the decision to send another 30,000 troops to Afghanistan over the next six months.  Having just watched his speech, I am convinced that he knows what is at stake, and I am also convinced that he just gave the best speech of his Presidency.  It was clear, concise, full of purpose, authoritative, and encouraging toward Americans.  One other thing it was that liberals across the globe are rueing; aggressive.

President Obama laid down the gauntlet tonight, not just for America, but for the world, and more importantly, for extremist terrorists everywhere.  “America has the stomach!”, is the gist of the message, as he echoed George W Bush, who first told us that this battle against extremism would not be fought conventionally, and would not be over with quickly.

In 2001, Usama bin Laden laid down a different sort of gauntlet, telling the world that America does not have the stomach for this fight.

Maybe many Americans thought that he meant our soldiers did not have the stomach for it.  But if you thought that, I have a newsflash for you;  Usama bin Laden wasn’t speaking to our soldiers when he said that.  He was speaking to you and me; everyday Americans, whom he sees as soft, weak, pampered, spoiled, and gutless.  He was insulting America, you and me, and telling us that he was going to do what he wanted to do to us, and that we would never stop him, because we were too cowardly to do what was necessary to win.

Our soldiers have the stomach; make no mistake about it.  Do you?  Do I?  Do we have the stomach to hear about casualties, to mourn, to hope and pray, and yet remain COMMITTED to victory?

That’s they key to UBL; committment.  He believes that you and I, everyday Americans, do not have what it takes to remain committed until victory is achieved.  His is the same arrogance that every despot, every criminal regime, in fact every criminal that ever lived shares.  It is the arrogance that says, “You are too much of a coward to do anything about what I do to you; you cannot outlast me.”  It is the attitude that the Mafia in America held, and that the Nazis in Germany displayed against their victims.  It is the neighborhoo bully picking on everyone he sees because no one has owned the comittment to stop him.

President Obama has the stomach.  I know I have the stomach.  Do you?

UBL and his sad bunch of cowardly swine will never quit.  They will never stop trying to hurt us.  We cannot wish them away, and we cannot stick our heads in the sand, ever.  So if you don’t have the stomach for this type of fight, you better learn how to develop one.  Not wanting to is not an available answer.  Get over it.

CREATING JOBS BY BUYING OUT PRE-RETIREES

We have a Jobs Summit coming up in Washington, so I thought I’d give up my idea for putting many of the unemployed back to work.

Although the numbers are iffy, there are currently approximately eight million people between the ages of 55 and 60 working full-time in America.  One way to create jobs for the unemployed would be to offer this age group a one time buyout.  The buyout would be worth $500,000, tax-free, and 55 to 60 year olds would only be eligible if they agreed to never enter the workforce full-time again, except to start a new, small business.  Couple that with some sort of bail out for existing small business owners in this age group, and I believe you would have between three and five million people accept the buyout.  The cost would be between $1.5 and $3 Trillion dollars, and would create space in our economy for the unemployed to replace those workers accepting the buyout.

The money dedicated to this endeavor would create more than jobs, though.  It would spur small business growth, aid existing small business owners contemplating closing their doors, as well spur new spending amongst the group of Americans most likely to actually spend it, 55 to 60 year olds.  It would also address a portion of the baby Boomer generation, that portion that would be retiring in five to ten years.  Those within that age group would have a definite boost to their retirement futures, and in essence, you could almost consider this as a direct bailout of the retirement funds they lost when America’s Bankers betrayed the entire country.

This is just a rough idea, but would it be feasible?

TERM LIMITS

Would you believe we have several Congresspeople who have held their elected seat for more than forty years?  Forty years!.  Yet, we hold our executive branch, the President of the United States, to two terms.  Furthermore, neither a bill nor an actual vote has ever been introduced in the House requiring term limits.  It was just too scary after FDR won four consecutive terms to the White House.  The United States Congress had to do something about this outrage, so they introduced term limits, for the executive branch.  Somehow, they believe it’s no problem at all to cultivate a ruling class in the House, who stays in Washington until they die.

Had they been young enough, we’d still have two or three members who participated in that vote still in office today.  Former Ku Klux Klan member Robert Byrd missed that distinction by only a few years.  He has served in the House since 1952, first as a Congressman, then as a Senator for the state of West Virginia.  He’s been in office for fifty-seven years!  It’s almost as if he was born there.  Part of the trouble with our system today is that there seems to be a ruling class who never, ever leaves Washington once they are there.  They look at Government “service” as their personal jobs program, and rarely do they ever wander back into the private world to get a real job.  I think I can safely say that many Americans feel as though our elected officials in Washington have lost touch with real America.

Furthermore, they have become corrupted by the way they do business in Washington.  Is it a mistruth to say that legislation is for sale to the highest bidders?  If you followed Lobbyist contributions and PAC money, you might believe, as I do, that there are no House members left who are not corrupted in some way.  We need to change that, and limiting their terms to two might be one way to solve this mess.  More and more Americans are coming to the conclusion that Washington smells funny.  More and more people are starting to believe that they have no real representation there, and that voting the incumbents out of office is not nearly as easy as it sounds.

True, we can limit the terms of our elected officials through the ballot box, but incumbents in the two major parties are very difficult to beat.  First, they have name recognition, and secondly, they have the financial and verbal backing of their party, which, oftentimes, uses lies and halftruths when fighting tooth-and-nail to hold onto every seat they own.  Removing an incumbent from power shouldn’t be a popularity contest.  It should be a mandate, and our elected officials should see it for what it really is; a method of forcing them to stay honest.

SUMMER, WHERE HAVE YOU GONE?

 

After weeks of waiting, and then more weeks of waiting, I have just discovered that Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles was cancelled.  I am crushed.  I was a die hard fan.  Instead, we have “V”, and about two hundred “Reality TV” shows.  Gag!

Summer Glau, where are you?!

RUMOR: FORT HOOD SHOOTER HAD ATTEMPTED TO CONTACT AL QAIDA

There is a rumor circulating that the Fort Hood shooter, Nidal Malik Hasan, had attempted to contact the terrorist group Al Qaeda, and that US officials knew of his attempts months ago.  I picked up the rumor from ABC’s website, here.

That, coupled with the fact that The Associated Press reported Sunday that Major Hasan attended the Falls Church, Virginia mosque when radical mosque leader  Anwar al Awlaki was there.  Following an intense FBI investigation into his activities, Awlaki fled to Yemen a few years ago.

If these rumors are true, this story will become the main focus of the tragedy that took 13 lives and saw 42 others wounded.  If US officials knew that Hasan had tried to contact Al Qaeda, and did nothing about it, do we then have to ask how many other things they have ignored?

Again, I must stress that this is a rumor.  I have not had opportunity to confirm this from any other source.

DEMOCRATIC SPIN: SINGLE-PAYER CAN’T PASS IN THIS POLITICAL CLIMATE

I left the following as a comment at a friend’s blog.  It was in response to the overwhelming spin the Democrat are using for why they won’t attempt Single_payer legislation.  They say it’s just not possible due to the vast opposition and the powerful corporate lobbying system.  They say Single Payer could never pass in this political climate.

 

“Single Payer WOULD have passed, with the help of a few smart people playing the parts of elected officials. Instead, we have the Democrats and Republicans.

Both parties govern not to provide the soundest possible legislation; rather they provide the legislation that will keep them in power. Both parties compromise the American people for the sake of “The Party”. Both parties are usually defeated before they ever get started whenever they attempt legislation which reflects their core values.

“We just can’t do it in this political climate”, “it’s not possible facing all this opposition”, are the usual platitudes we hear both party hacksters repeat over and over until the bulk of their followers succumb, and agree. Thank God our founding fathers had some balls, and some honor. Can you imagine this current group of clowns trying to write our constitution? I can’t. If we had been forced to let Republicans and Democrats face down the King, we’d still be vassals of England.

What we are getting right now, as Americans, is the lowest common denominator, and often, the path of least resistance. That’s not good enough. Yet neither party can change that way of doing things. Their very nature makes it impossible for them to do so. Group think is group think, and both parties are already defeated.

If you outlaw political parties, you will stand a chance of changing every major problem in Washington. It’s not the corporations standing in the way of change.   It’s the two parties. They are swimming in contaminated water, and rather than emptying the pool, they prefer to swim in filth and try to clean the water using bleach every so often. How has that worked?

When a party has a majority as huge as the Democrats have, and still can’t pass legislation, nay, won’t even attempt to bring legislation to a vote that would reflect their core values, what does that say about your party? Is this the best we can do? I think if you asked most Americans, they’d say “no”. Ask most Americans the one question no Republican nor Democrat, nor even mainstream media member wants them to answer:

“Do you think America would be better off without political parties?”   What do you think would be the overwhelming majority of answers?”

DEMOCRATS TAKE HEALTH CARE REFORM BILL TO THE HOUSE

Democrats in the House of Representatives passed their version of the Health Care reform bill, complete with a version of the Public Option.  There are numerous reasons to celebrate this, but there are also numerous reasons why this bill could end up being a major hurdle in the way of Single Payer health care.

At any rate, the Democrats won 220-215…hmmm… not much defense played in that game.

FORT HOOD, TEXAS

Twelve dead, 31 wounded at Fort Hood, Texas.  Not many details coming out, but rumors are spreading that there were three shooters, all of them US soldiers.  My heart is with all of you.

If you believe in God, pray for their families.  If not, send them your thoughts.

Oh…look, the Mainstream Media is having multiple orgasms again…

I wonder how much blood they’ll squeeze from this bunch of turnips.  Fucking vultures.